UNTIL THE DEEP WATER STILLS

STORM CLOUDS 

 

 

Today’s theme is storm clouds because there’s trouble everywhere.

 

I don’t know what I was thinking. The whole purpose of meeting Nicholas was to let him down easy and extricate myself from the situation. It was an outlet I needed for awhile and he got to stretch his acting wings. No harm, no foul. At least that’s what I thought.

 

There was some sexual innuendo in the play acting we’ve been doing for the past year. I supposed I was a little flattered. But an innocent flirtation was the most I ever saw it as.

 

 

Did he make the first move or did I? It might have been me. I was just being nice dropping him at his apartment after we talked. But then I caught him checking me out. It’s been years since that happened to me.

 

It was like those moments when I see a window open and I have to capture it. He hesitated. I saw the thought form in his eyes and spread across that face of a thousand expressions. Letting the moment pass was just not an option. Something kicked in that I couldn’t deny. I don’t even remember how I got him out of the car afterwards.

 

I’m just going to put it out of my mind today. I’ve got other storm clouds to deal with.

 

 

Am I really going to do this? Planning it is one thing. Actually going through with it is huge. Jayce is going to walk into the gallery thinking he can slide by under the radar like he always does. He won’t be expecting a bear trap.

 

It seems so calculated and cruel but I can’t see any other way to do it than to blindside him. His defense system is too perfect. The truth has to come from a direction he’ll never expect or he’ll deflect it away like he always does.

 

I’ve got storm clouds all around me now. Who is Michael-John’s biological father? Does Jayce have a right to know? What do I owe Nicholas?

 

All I know is I couldn’t stop the thunder now even if I wanted to. I’m too far down this road to think about turning back.