Hmmm, is there a cure for tech turmoil syndrome?
The association I work for recently carried out a major update to our systems. That pretty much guarantees that tech turmoil will ensue. On Thursday my connection to the network dropped and refused to be resurrected. Bad news when you are working from home.
It became one of those forget about getting anything done because you’ll be on the line with tech support for hours kind of day. It involved the tech guy uploading files to a cloud site, me downloading the files to my personal laptop, saving them on a USB drive and being talked through the arduous process of installing and running them on my work laptop.
In times of like these, my coping mechanism is to fantasize about how I would really like to interact with tech support.
Michael: Before you ask, I did the idiot reboot three times. It didn’t help one damn bit.
Tech Guy: Okay, let me take a look. I can access your laptop remotely.
Michael: Would it help if I smack it with a hammer?
Tech Guy: No, don’t do that. It won’t help.
Michael: But it would help me. It would make me feel so much better.
Tech Guy: Ha, ha. Seriously, don’t do that. Put the hammer down.
Michael: What if I Frisbee it out the window?
Tech Guy: Definitely not. Don’t do that.
Michael: That was really more of a rhetorical question. Hold on a minute, I need to go outside and pick it up… Okay, I’m back.”
Tech Guy: You’re kidding, right? You didn’t really do that.
Michael: Don’t worry. It still seems to be in one piece, more or less.
Tech Guy: More or less?
Michael: Should it be making a loud buzzing noise like a rabid cicada?
Tech Guy: Um, no.
Michael: Hold on. Let me Frisbee it out the window again… Wow, it bounced real high this time! Hold on a minute… Okay, I’m back. Good news. The buzzing stopped.
Tech Guy: This is not the way it’s supposed to go.
Michael: Okay, no more Frisbee. I’ll punt it this time…Oh neat! Sparks flew out of it. A real fireworks display. Hold on a minute… Okay, I’m back. I got most of it.
Tech Guy: Most of it?
Michael: Yeah, most of the pieces. A dog ran off with the rest. I think I need a new unit.
Tech Guy: … I’m closing your support ticket now.
Michael: Roger that. When will my new laptop arrive?
Laptop Frisbee, it’s more than just a metaphor. It works!
~ Now Available Online from Amazon, Chapters Indigo or Barnes & Noble: Hunting Muskie, Rites of Passage – Stories by Michael Robert Dyet
~ Michael Robert Dyet is also the author of Until the Deep Water Stills – An Internet-enhanced Novel which was a double winner in the Reader Views Literary Awards 2009. Visit Michael’s website at www.mdyetmetaphor.com or the novel online companion at www.mdyetmetaphor.com/blog.
~ Subscribe to Michael’s Metaphors of Life Journal aka That Make Me Go Hmmm at its’ internet home www.mdyetmetaphor.com/blog2. Instructions for subscribing are provided in the Subscribe to this Blog: How To instructions page in the right sidebar. If you’re reading this post on another social networking site, come back regularly to my page for postings once a week
Tags: Frisbee · metaphor · Michael Robert Dyet · tech turmoilNo Comments