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Federal Election 2021: A Five Week Olympic Fact-dodging Sprint

August 21st, 2021 by Michael Dyet

Hmmm, did we not just do this every fourth year dance only a little while ago?

We are heading to the polls on September 20th for another federal election. Justin Trudeau says he called the election because Canadians deserve a choice.

Okay Justin, my choice is that you do not spend $500 million on an election in the middle of the fourth wave of a pandemic when you have only been in office 18 months and have already accumulated massive debt with all the pandemic emergency relief programs.

But of course, it is not at all about choice for us or about what is in our best interest. The most prophetic statement I have ever heard about politics is this one: The primary purpose of any government is to get itself re-elected. Trudeau called the election in the hope of capitalizing on positive public sentiment to secure a majority government. It is that simple.

The only positive in the matter is that Trudeau chose the shortest possible lead time for an election. We will only have to listen to all the political rhetoric for a few weeks before marking our X on the ballet. Personally, I hope Canadians wrap Trudeau’s knuckles by booting his party out of power.

Or how about this: If the Liberal government does not secure a majority, Trudeau must parade naked through the streets of Ottawa chanting:

I rolled the dice and lost,

Oh my, what a cost.

No salary for me.

I’ll rule for free,

With an out of tune banjo on my knee.

But for the next month we will have to endure the usual PR spin as the parties roll out their platforms and carpetbag of promises. Forget about the catch phrases and the grandiose plans. The bottom line is always the same.

The Party in Power: We’ve done a bang-up job since we’ve been in power. Yes, there were a few scandals and we didn’t keep half our promises. But we’re on the right track. Don’t worry if the numbers in our economic policies don’t add up. Political math is a complicated thing. 2 + 2 can equal 4 or 2 or 7 depending on how you work the numbers.

The Opposition Parties: Everything the party in power has done is by definition wrong. The Prime Minister just isn’t fit to lead. Our guy is so much better. No mud on his boots (yet). Don’t worry if the numbers in our economic policies don’t add up. Political math is a complicated thing. Those guys play fast and loose with the numbers. The way we manipulate them is much better.

Think of this election as an Olympic event – a five week sprint to the wire where elbowing, tripping, shin-kicking, mudslinging and fact-dodging is all legal. The Gold Medal winner is the guy who shadow boxes best without ever actually giving a straight answer to a single question. Silver and Bronze medals are given out but they are consolation prizes at best.

~ Now Available Online from Amazon, Chapters Indigo or Barnes & Noble: Hunting Muskie, Rites of Passage – Stories by Michael Robert Dyet

~ Michael Robert Dyet is also the author of Until the Deep Water Stills – An Internet-enhanced Novel which was a double winner in the Reader Views Literary Awards 2009. Visit Michael’s website at www.mdyetmetaphor.com .

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