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A Baby Boomer’s “Just So You Know” Declaration.

October 14th, 2023 by Michael Dyet

Hmmm, I think you may have underestimated my ability to be stubborn.

As a member of the Baby Boomer generation, I am rather set in my ways and disinclined to surrender to the “do it our way” pressures that are increasingly being aimed at me. The “that’s just the way it is” argument carries no weight with me. Hence, I feel it necessary to make a few just so you know declarations.

To Intact Insurance

I acknowledge your notice that you are going paperless and that I can access my policy documents online. Just so you know, I will be printing all those documents for my files and resenting you as I do so. All paperless means to me is that I have to do the printing instead of you. And by the way, your Online Service Centre was out of service for a full day!

To Utilities Companies

Your labyrinthian voice mail systems are designed to prevent me from ever speaking to a living, breathing person. Just so you know, I will persist in cracking the code of your system to reach the Speak to a Representative option no matter how many levels deep you bury it. And no, I am not interested in chatting with your AI entity regardless of what human name you give it.

To the Limeridge Mall Rogers Store

Your continuing text messages enticing me to upgrade to the latest, greatest new digital device are deleted immediately upon receipt. My antique-vintage iPhone still works just fine. Just so you know, I will continue to use it until it rolls over and dies. I do not care that your iPhone 15 Pro has a Super Retina XDR Display whatever the hell that means.

To all Retail Chain Stores

You clearly see self-serve checkouts as the way of the future. Just so you know, I will go out of my way to sniff out stores that still offer full-service checkout. Amazon is kicking your ass anyway when it comes to service. A day may come when I will not need your store at all.

To Politicians

You are fond of making a bevy of grand promises to try to get my vote. Just so you know, I apply the divide by three and subtract two formulae to determine the number of promises you are likely to keep. And Doug Ford, where you are concerned, I will cast a write-in vote for the ghost of Elvis before I vote for you.

To HP

You continue to nag me about Finishing the Set-up on my laptop. I have done all the set-up I require to do what I need to do. Just so you know, I will continue to click on the Remind Me in Three Days button until hell freezes over or you get the message – whichever comes first.

Just so you know, I am Baby Boomer stubborn and proud of it. Stubborn as a mule. As stubborn as the will of kings. Stubborn as a stone. I will outlast you regardless of what tactics you employ to try to convert me to your way of thinking. That’s just the way it is.

~ Now Available Online from Amazon, Chapters Indigo or Barnes & Noble: Hunting Muskie, Rites of Passage – Stories by Michael Robert Dyet

~ Michael Robert Dyet is also the author of Until the Deep Water Stills – An Internet-enhanced Novel which was a double winner in the Reader Views Literary Awards 2009. Visit Michael’s website at www.mdyetmetaphor.com .

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